Curriculum Vitae

The first beer I can remember drinking was a Miller Genuine Draft with a chunk of lime crammed down the neck. I was seventeen and sitting in the back of a pickup truck singing about the emgeeeeedeee sunrise coming up over the rest of the campground. I drank that beer, and I drank a few more, and I decided that I didn't like it because it didn't get you drunk fast enough and it tasted like shit. I spent a few more years like that, swilling the cheapest of vodkas and grudgingly imbibing thirtyracks of pisswater. I loved it; ignorance was bliss.
When I was almost nineteen, I tasted my first beer. I thought that the Deschutes Cindercone Red Seasonal Ale gripped in my fist was perhaps the foulest beverage I had ever allowed to pass between my lips. A friend of mine had shoved it off on me after he stole it from his dad's fridge.
"This shit is gross. Do you want it Pat? You'll drink it right?"
True to form, I answered "Probably," and probability proved a blessing. I took one swallow, coughed it on my jeans and poured the rest down the sink. At that moment though, the flicker of curiosity that governs the world of beer jumped, igniting the now comfortably ablaze appreciation I have for a good brew. That one bitter bite showed me that there were more options to beer than just lite, ice and original.
Two years later, I had my first pint. I had been twenty one for about six minutes, had a glass in each hand and another resting on the table. In the name of efficency I tried to drink all three at the same time. I coughed those on my jeans too. However, the following day, I had my first real pint, sitting and relaxing, enjoying the intricacies and delicacies of each little Drop Top sip with my beermigos. Now, I can't help but think, just a little bit, just the tip, about the composition, the make up, ingredients and process that goes into every beer I drink. Some beers don't require much thought, but others keep my head spinning, even to the point where the room keeps moving once I lay down and try to sleep.
Beer is good. It is healthy and delicious. I have tried many and I plan to try more. Someday, I might make my own for you to try. But for now, I will describe, in too much detail, my relationships with beer for your amusement and education. Thus is my mission.

Peace,

Pat


P.S.

Top five beers off the top of my head
1. Dollar Pabst (any form)
2. Pitcher of Blue Moon
3. Pint of Deschutes Black Butte Porter
4. Amnesia
5. Case of Fat Tire