New Fancy Pants Rating System

As much as Doug, Pat, and myself have enjoyed putting this collection of reviews together, I've felt there was something missing. I always wanted to have some sort of scale to rate our beers, a little OCD yes, but the problem is there really aren't any beers out there that I don't like. It's not as if week in, and week out we could say "this beer is awesome, this beer is amazing." After a while, it would sound stupid. While discussing this with Doug, we've decided on creating our own scale of the perfect situation for the reviewed beer. Factors that will attribute to a beer's rating are pretty simple; complexity of tastes, alcohol content, and any other natural feeling that comes with the brew. Here are the categories and their generic personalities:

Ball game brew: This beer isn't the most complex beer you will find on the market. Since you're at a ball game, it wont be very high in alcohol content, that way one can enjoy a couple of beers without being too tanked to not pay attention to the sporting event. Drunkenness + foul balls= Bad News Bears, and not the ones Walter Matthau coached.

Throw Backs: These are very similar to the Ball Game Brews, except they'll be a little higher in alcohol content. The primary reason for them having more alcohol is because you'll be more worried about sinking the same cup as your partner in beirut, than deciphering why your team's O-line can't pick up the defense's blitz package in their over front.

The Beer while at dinner with the In-Laws/Girlfriend or Boyfriend's parents: This beer is higher in quality than the first two, but not high in alcohol content. It shows your special someone's parents you aren't cheap, but at the same time you can drink one or two with out being smashed and looking like an alcoholic.

The Burger and a Brew Beer: This kind of beer is typically a micro brew that tend to be higher end, but because of the special with the burger, it's too good of a deal not to get. The alcohol content can vary, but the most important thing is that the taste must flow with beef, tomato, lettuce, onion, and a bun. Cheese optional.

The Onesy Brew: These fine specimens are very complex, and should really be enjoyed slowly to appreciated the beautiful concoction of malt and hops. The beermigos have enjoyed many of these at Monday night bingo at Sam Bond's (highly recommended), but be careful, three or four of these may put you in a situation where it might not be a good idea to bike back home from bingo.

The Debating the Meaning of Life with your own Beermigos Brew: This is a very rare craft of beer. It is in the upper crust of taste complexity, all the meanwhile still being very smooth to allow clear thoughts. Typically these beers bring to mind Benjamin Franklin's quote, "beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." Once done acknowledging that masterful quote, your own philosophy begins to pour out just as smoothly as the beer that started the mood.